Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?
12.06.2025 12:59
When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.
Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.
For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.
Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.
I was tired of trying and failing.
This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.
Protein bars may not have the health benefits that you think, study finds - AOL.com
Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.
Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.
You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.
Apple drops a spot on 2025 Fortune 500 list - 9to5Mac
What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.
But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.
I had run out of hope.
Over 3,000 Private Credit Deals From Just 20 Analysts Raise Questions on Wall Street - Bloomberg.com
It’s still here.
In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.
It’s here now, writing to you.
Scientists Just Discovered a Lost Ancient Culture That Vanished - 404 Media
And the sadness?
It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.
It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.
Why should we share our wife with others?
So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.
But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.
You are like me, then.
PlayStation Plus subscribers react to June free game line-up: 'massive win’ - GAMINGbible
So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”
The sadness was still there.
It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.
What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.
Be who you already are.
Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.
Are there girls here who like group sex?
I was tired of fighting.
It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.